2026 冬

'待人接物的反思’ 

‘Reflection on being with people and things’

今年冬天，借著soca的教室，ciwacha 在一個周天接待了幾位來喝茶的客人。
接待這個詞很有意思，中文裏接待的近義詞有招待，對待，款待。它們都圍繞一個‘待’字，卻有不同的意味。

我查了漢典：
招待：是對賓客給予應有的待遇，
款待：是殷勤接待，親切優厚地招待
對待：是以某種態度或行為面對人事物

通過這次的茶會，我一直在想自己怎樣待人，怎樣待物。

This winter, thanks to the generous support of SoCA, ciwacha welcomed a few guests for tea on a Sunday.

The Chinese word for "hosting" is interesting. It has several related words: jiedai (接待), zhaodai (招待), kuandai (款待), and duidai (对待). They all share the character 待dai, yet each carries a different nuance.

I looked them up in the Chinese dictionary,

招待 (zhaodai): welcoming and looking after guests

• In Chinese, a host can apologise for "not taking good enough care of you (招待不周), not because they have failed, but as a way of expressing their wish that they could have cared for their guests better.

款待 (kuandai): welcoming guests with warmth and generosity.

• Guests may respond by thanking the host for their generous hospitality(多谢款待), acknowledging the care and effort that went into the preparation.

对待 (duidai): the way we are with people and things.

• Unlike the other two words, duidai is used in many different situations. It describes the attitude, attention, and care we bring to our relationships and how we choose to be with people and things.

After this Sunday, I found myself reflecting on how I treat people, and how I treat things.

這場茶會並不是從當天開始的，前兩天工作室要清潔，澆花，劈柴，要擺放冬季的花枝，搭好茶桌，掛好幕簾。前一天要備茶，考慮客人的身體，當天的天氣，器物的尺寸和材料。

當天早上我起床去工作室，除塵，擦拭，凈物，生火，稱茶，我感到很安寧。

在今年早些時候很意外的開始對禮儀感興趣，盡管我的文化中有各種禮儀的規訓和傳統，但我想我從來沒有認真思考過，也沒有虛心學習過禮儀。我開始閱讀關於禮儀的書籍，想要了解禮儀對身體的規訓以及在禪宗裏對身體的戒律。

我的老師要求我在茶會前向客人鞠躬。我依葫蘆畫瓢的鞠躬很多次，但從來都不是很明白到底要怎麽樣才算一個好的鞠躬。她的鞠躬總是很美麗，鞠躬之後開始茶禮儀，在這期間她的舉手投足都是如此的沈穩和放松，透露著一種淡雅。在跟她喝茶的時間裏，我已經忘記了很多茶的味道，但她的氣質卻一直讓我想起。

This tea gathering did not begin on the day itself.

Two days beforehand, the studio was cleaned. The plants were watered, firewood split, winter branches arranged, the tea table prepared, and the curtains hung. The day before, I selected the teas, thinking about each guest's conditions, the weather on that day, and the size and material of the teawares I would use.

On the morning, I arrived at the studio to do the final dusting, wiping surfaces, cleaning the utensils, lighting the fire, and weighing the tea. I am at peace.

Earlier this year, I became interested in etiquette. Although I grew up surrounded by traditions and social rituals, I realised I had never truly reflected on them or studied them. I began reading about etiquette, hoping to understand how ritual disciplines the body, and how bodily discipline is understood within Chan(禅) practice.

Before I start to brew my tea, my teacher asks me to bow to the guests.

I have imitated her bow many times, yet I never really understood what makes a good bow.

Her bow is always beautiful. After bowing, she begins the tea ceremony, and her gestures are calm, firm, and quietly graceful. I have forgotten the taste of many teas we shared together, but I still remember her presence.

有一次我的老師看我的動作，她說，你太急躁了。請慢下來。而我明明已經是慢一拍的節奏了。那時我以為急躁的反義詞就是慢下來，但現在，我終於明白僅僅是慢下來，也是不夠的。

於是我開始練習正確的鞠躬，這包括鞠躬的角度，腹肌繃緊的程度，肩膀和胸膛放松的感覺，脖子的舒展以及眼神的柔和。想要鞠好一個躬，我需要全心全意。而僅僅是一個鞠躬，我仍在訓練，更別說那無數個待人接物，註水，奉茶的細小動作了。

我盡量專註地對待我手中的器物，專註的感受茶葉的狀態，認真謙虛地將我今天泡的茶奉給客人們。這是我分享的方式。

Once, she watched my movements and said,

"You are too impatient. Please slow down."

I remember thinking, But I'm already moving slowly.

At that time, I believed the opposite of impatience was simply to slow down.

Now I finally understand that slowing down is not enough.

So I began practising how to bow properly: the angle of the body, the engagement of the core, the softness of the shoulders and chest, the length of the neck, the gentleness of the gaze.

To offer a good bow, I have to be completely present.

And if I am still learning something as simple as bowing, how much more is there to learn in all the small gestures of meeting people, pouring water, and serving tea?

I try to give my full attention to the teawares in my hands, to listen carefully to the condition of the leaves, and to offer the tea I have prepared with my full sincerity.

This is how I share.

而今天我發現，對身體的練習，漸漸也體現在茶中。今天我們泡了阿裏山珠露以及布朗普洱。以前我總是泡不好布朗普洱，它總是太強烈，太多太滿，讓人迷惑。而今天我終於將它的茶感和味道泡出了溫柔和穩定。

我悄悄的有點小高興，原來不知不覺間我前進了一小步。也許這一年來我並不是慢下來了，我只是不那麽急躁了。

感謝大家來參加這場茶會，也很珍惜大家對我的反饋。我知道仍有很多要學的地方，不僅僅是訓練鞠躬這件小事，我還有很長的路可以走。另外，也很感恩在學習茶的過程中有機會與人交流，分享。

Today I realised that this practice of the body has gradually begun to appear in my tea.

We served Alishan Zhulu and Bulang Pu'er on the Sunday. For a long time, I struggled with this Bulang Pu'er. It always felt too complicated, too full, too overwhelming.

But today, for the first time, I found a gentle steadiness in it.

Yay, I felt a little happy.

Without noticing, I had taken a small step forward.

Perhaps over this past year I have not simply become slower.

Perhaps I have simply become a little less impatient.

Thank you to everyone who came to the tea gathering and thank you for all your thoughtful feedback.

I know there is still so much for me to learn - not only in something as small as bowing, but in everything that surrounds it. I feel grateful to share this journey with you. 

現在，請回到我說的「待人接物」，

在中文裏，」接待」對我來說是一個比較中性的詞語。人來人往，我接受，我靜待。

」招待」，是不是有點匆忙？那不是我希望呈現的狀態。

「款待」，又像是一種盛大華麗的準備，那也並不是我的初心。

而我越來越喜歡「對待「。
對，是面對。
我面對茶，也面對你，
茶面對我，也面對你。
我們彼此相對，也彼此等待。

在這場周末的接待中，我們珍惜著時間，珍惜器物，珍惜茶水，珍惜爐火，珍惜空間，珍惜花朵，珍惜身邊人。

Now, I'd like to return to the idea of treating people and things.

 

Among these Chinese words, jiedai (接待), "to host," feels the most neutral to me. People come and go. I let them. I quietly wait.

Zhaodai (招待), "to entertain," feels a little hurried, almost like waving someone over. That isn't the environment I hope to create.

Kuandai (款待), "to lavishly host," suggests a grand and generous occasion. That isn't my intention either.

The word I find myself loving more and more is duidai (对待).

The character 对 means "to face."

I face the tea.

I face you.

The tea faces me.

It faces you.

We face one another.

We wait with one another.

During this weekend's gathering, we cherished time, cherished the teawares, the tea, the fire, the space, the flowers, and the people around us.

請允許我也借這個小小的機會感謝和我一起接待的人們。能在我學習工作的學校組織這場茶會對我來說非常的特別，我和我勤勞同事們製作器皿，生火燒窯，種花除草，每一個細節裏都滋養著這場茶會的空間。我十分明白，這次的接待並不是我一個人就能完成的。有人提前為茶會劈了柴，有人提前清洗地面，有人漿洗幕簾，有人插剪花枝，有人整理桌臺，每一個細節都被人好好的對待過，才能有這次ciwacha在SoCA的接待。

希望喜歡器皿和茶的人，也從這些器物和茶的背後體會到了這種溫暖的對待。

最後，祝大家冬天愉快。
謝謝你的閱讀。

I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank everyone who helped make this gathering possible. Being able to organise a tea gathering at the school where I study and work felt especially meaningful. We draw and paint, we make clay works, we fire the kiln, and care for the space. Every small act quietly nourished the place.

I know very well that this gathering could never have been created by one person alone. Someone split the firewood beforehand, someone cleaned the floors, someone washed the curtains, someone arranged the winter branches, someone prepared the tables. Every detail had already been cared for long before our guests arrived. It was only because so many hands had quietly cared for every small detail that ciwacha was able to welcome everyone to SoCA.

I hope those who love pottery and tea were able to feel some of this quiet care through them.

Wishing everyone a gentle winter.

Thank you for reading.

photographs：Callum.K, Chris.E, Yundi.W, Jihyeon.K, Kate.W

write by ciwacha